


I Wish I Could Freeze Time

by KrisLetang



Category: Law & Order: SVU
Genre: Chasing Rapists, Daddy Rafi Feels, Established Relationship, F/M, Fighting, First Day of School, Growing Up Kids, Rafael is grumpy, Sadness, domestic life, parenting, worrying
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-11
Updated: 2018-02-11
Packaged: 2019-03-16 17:17:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,293
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13640850
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KrisLetang/pseuds/KrisLetang
Summary: You and Rafael drop your daughter off at school for the first time.





	I Wish I Could Freeze Time

**Author's Note:**

> Here’s another little fic I found in my old stuff. I’m still working on the next part of demons, I’m slowly but surely getting there. Hope y’all enjoy and let me know what you think! 
> 
> Also, yes, I do usually use the same names for Rafael’s fake children hahaha
> 
> Also Rafael is the son’s name too, usually referred to as Rafa but not always

You scrambled to pick up the glass that had just tumbled onto the kitchen floor before orange juice spilled everywhere, but you were too late. Now your floor was not only covered in cheerios but also sticky orange liquid. To make matters worse, your two year old son, Rafa, started wailing. “Fantastic,” you whispered. “Rafael!” you yelled, hoping your husband might come out here and give you a hand, “We are going to be late,” he had been standoffish all week, getting annoyed easily and snapping at you for no reason. “Gabriella, stop making your brother cry,” you snapped, trying to handle all of this. She finally sat back down in her chair, eating her food. Rafael finally made an appearance once you were about ready to start crying. 

“Gabriella, ven aqui, you have to get dressed,” he called, beckoning her over. You just covered your face with your hands, you were so tired and you had only been up for two hours. Rafael’s hand on your shoulder made you feel a little bit better, “Cariño, are you alright?” he asked softly. You nodded, sniffling slightly, 

“Everything is just going wrong,” you murmured, standing up and grabbing a towel to wipe the floor. Rafael was holding Rafa, calming him down while simultaneously pouring a cup of coffee for himself. He was still in his boxers, his hair wet and he was not even remotely ready to go. After you cleaned up a bit more, you walked up behind him, wrapping your arms around his midsection and pressing your lips between his shoulder blades, “Honey, is there a reason you aren’t dressed, we have to leave in fifteen minutes,” you reminded him. 

“I’ll be ready,” he insisted, taking another gulp of his drink. You sighed softly, he was still in a mood. Well it was his problem if he wasn’t ready, not yours. You couldn’t worry about two children, yourself, and him when he was going to act like this. You cleared the table, dumping dirty dishes in the sink for when you got home later before hurrying back to check on Gabriella. You helped her brush her teeth and get her things together, grabbing your own jacket and things. 

“Rafael!” you called, tapping your foot. You ran a hand through your hair, finding a soggy cheerio from Rafa’s tantrum earlier. Your son came running out to you on cue, fully dressed and clean, but that was not the Rafael you were looking for. You scooped him up into your arms, zipping him into his jacket. now you were starting to get annoyed, where the hell was your husband. You set Rafael down, “Gabriella, you hold his hand, I will be back in a few moments with Papi,” you instructed, quickly heading down the hallway and into your bedroom. Rafael was just starting to pull on his pants, a shirt and the matching vest and jacket laid out on the bed. “Rafi, what the hell,” you said, grabbing him a belt and tie from his side of the closet, 

“Not that one,” he simply said, pointing out a different tie that he wanted. You rolled your eyes, exchanging it for the one he requested. 

“Rafael, what is going on with you this week?” you asked, but he just clenched his jaw, buttoning up his cufflinks. You sighed and gave up, coming over to help him with his tie while he pulled on his shoes. Finally, he grabbed his briefcase, following you out to your children. You got them buckled into their seats in record time, but the traffic was hell as usual. Rafael was paying no attention to anything, instead doing something on his phone while you were trying to not crash the car and to get your children to stop screaming from the backseat, “Gabriella, shush,” you hissed, slamming on the brakes as some idiot made a sudden stop. 

“Are you trying to give me whiplash?” Rafael grumbled. 

“Well this would be a lot easier if you would get off your damn phone and help me,” you shot back. 

Rafael looked over at you, an eyebrow raised, “Help you drive?” 

“Are you deaf or something, do you not hear our screaming children?” You were so fed up with him acting like this. You weren’t sure if you had pissed him off in some way that was eluding you or if he was just tired, but this was getting old fast.

“Mami,” Gabriella screeched on cue, “Rafa threw his toy at me again,” 

“Rafael, basta!” your husband finally scolded, “And Gabriella, quiet down, now,” You just shook your head slightly, grateful for the brief silence. Finally you pulled into the parking lot of the elementary school, getting out and unbuckling Gabriella from her booster seat. Rafael was right behind you, locking the car door behind him after ensuring the temperature would be okay to leave Rafa in for ten minutes. Rafael took Gabriella’s hand, leading her silently into the building and down the hallway. 

“Here we are,” you said, grinning from ear to ear and kneeling down in front of Gabriella, “Okay honey, Papi will be here to get you later, I just want you to have fun,” you said softly, hugging her. You couldn’t say it wasn’t hard watching your daughter start kindergarten, it was, but you were excited for her to get older and experience things. 

Rafael knelt down by her after you stood up, holding her against him silently for what felt like forever. When he opened his eyes and they were red rimmed, you started to understand what was going on. “Mija, I love you, be careful and have fun. You know where my cell phone number is if you need me?” Gabriella nodded, seemingly ready to go into her classroom, but Rafael wouldn’t let her go. 

“Papi, let me go,” she whined, “You’re squeezing too tight,” Rafael finally let her out of his arms, 

“It’s going to be okay, you’re going to have lots of fun,” he said softly, but you weren’t sure if that was for Gabriella’s benefit or his own. “Te amo princesa,” he whispered, 

“Bye,” Gabriella called, running into the classroom as soon as she could wriggle free. You laughed a little bit, but then Rafael turned toward you, his face stoic, but his eyes told the whole story. All of your anger and frustration from earlier was washed away, replaced by sympathy. You gently caressed Rafael’s cheek with your thumb, pulling his face closer to your own. He leaned his forehead against yours, clutching onto you like his life depended on it, 

“Is this what has been bothering you so much?” you whispered, gently stroking the hair at the nape of his neck with your fingers. 

“When the hell did she turn five?” he murmured. 

“June 12th,” you teased him, trying to get a smile, but he instead just shut his eyes, a few tears managing to escape, 

“She’s my little girl,” Rafael whispered, “I remember when we took her home from the hospital (Y/N), it feels like just yesterday,” You pressed your lips against his for a second, pulling away and wiping the tears away from his cheeks, 

“Rafi, honey, she’s growing up. I know it’s hard to let her go, but this is good I promise,” you tried to reassure him. 

“I know,” he replied, “I know this is good for her, but it doesn’t make it easy for me,” Finally you took his hand, squeezing it as you headed back out to the car, “She didn’t even give me a kiss goodbye,” 

“Rafael, you’re going to see her in a few hours, it’s really not all that long. I know it’s hard, but take a breath and remember that she loves you,” you said softly. Rafael smiled slightly at that, “And darling, I love you,” you added. You both climbed back in the car, and Rafael peeked back at your son who had fallen asleep in his carseat at some point. 

“Rafa’s become quite a force to reckoned with recently,” your husband said softly, 

“You know what they say,” you replied as you pulled out, “Terrible twos. He threw cheerios in my hair this morning and then Gabriella knocked over a glass of juice. I’m surprised we even made it out of the door at all,” 

“I kind of miss when he didn’t want to squirm out of my arms every time I held him,” Rafael whispered. You turned toward him, 

“Babe, why didn’t you tell me you were feeling this way before? All week you were angry, you could have talked to me about it,” you said. You were sick of him not communicating. 

“I’m sorry,” he whispered, “It’s just hard for me to even think about it (Y/N),” You reached over and squeezed his leg, trying to be comforting. He seemed to think for a few moments before looking at you, “Gabriella was wearing a pink dress right?” he asked. You immediately rolled your eyes, 

“Rafael, don’t even start this again. She isn’t going to be abducted,” you whispered. Your husband was such a damn worrier, 

“You don’t know that,” he fired back, “You see everything that happens (Y/N), you know just as well as me that there are bad people out there,” 

“Rafi,” you said, shaking your head, “Gabriella will be absolutely fine, please try not to stress yourself out all day,” His muscles were rigid as he stared out the window, and you felt bad, you didn’t know what to say to make him feel better. 

…………………………………………………………………………………………..

When you got home that night, your feet hurt, and you were exhausted. Sonny and you had chased down a rapist earlier, and you were pretty sure you were going to have some nice bruises later. When you went over to the sink to wash the dishes, there was nothing there; you smiled. Rafael must have done them when he got home which was much more thoughtful than he had been all week so far. You wanted to just hold him and make him feel better about all of this. It was dark in the apartment, you assumed Rafael was either in the bedroom or in his office, so you headed back to Gabriella’s and Rafa’s rooms to check on them. You had been held up at work later than you had expected. Both your children were in bed, safe, and asleep. Finally you stripped off your clothes, pulling on an old tee shirt and climbing into bed. You didn’t have the energy to get a shower, you just wanted to sleep. You heard the door open, but rolling over and opening your eyes seemed like far too much work. “Cariño, I didn’t hear you come in,” Rafael whispered, crawling into bed behind you. His hands were gentle as they wrapped around your waist, but you still sharply drew in a breath as he touched a particularly sore area, “Rough day?” he asked, moving his hands away from that particular spot.

“Sonny and I had to chase this son of a bitch rapist, left some marks,” you murmured, cuddling into his arms more, “Are you feeling any better?” 

“Maybe a little,” he whispered by your ear, “Gabriella told me she had a good day and Rafa apparently was a tiny nightmare for the babysitter,” 

“I have off tomorrow, I’ll talk to him,” you replied groggily, “I told you she would be fine,” 

“You were right for once,” Rafael teased, kissing the top of your head. You shook your head at him. 

“You gave them both a bath? Had them brush their teeth?” you asked after a few moments of silence. 

“No, and I fed them whiskey and chocolate for dinner,” Rafael sarcastically replied, 

“Alright, geez,” you said with a laugh, stroking his hand. You fell into a comfortable silence, Rafael snaking a hand under your shirt and running his fingers across the smooth skin of your stomach. You quickly started to doze off, in fact you were half asleep when Rafael spoke again, 

“I miss being able to hold them, when they were small enough to fit in my arms,” his voice was hopeful and suddenly you were much more awake. 

“Rafael,” you whispered, turning over and taking his face into your hands. He pressed his lips against yours, kissing up your jawline before whispering in your ear, 

“(Y/N), what if we had another baby?” You jolted back, surprised by what he said, 

“Wait, what?” you said. Rafael suddenly looked sheepish and nervous. He went quiet, “Rafi, do you really want another kid?” you finally asked after a few quiet moments. He looked up at you, 

“Would it really be so bad?” he asked, he had tears in his eyes. You reached up and brushed away the few that escaped, 

“Hey, shh, I never said no,” you reminded him. He looked up at you, took a breath, and then drew you in for a kiss, his hands going to the hem of your shirt, “Woah, woah, Raf,” you whispered, breathlessly as he started in on your neck, “Not-ah, not tonight, I’m way too tired,” He pressed one more kiss against your forehead, 

“I love you, think about it,” he whispered before pulling you into his arms again and shutting his eyes. You breathed in the scent that was Rafael, it was comforting, it was home. The more you thought about another baby, the more you liked the idea. 

“Rafi,” you whispered,

“Hmm,” he murmured back, 

“Do you think Gabriella and Rafa will be able to share a room without killing each other?” He grinned at you, leaning his forehead down against yours. 

“You’re sure?” he asked, “Not just for me?” 

“I’m sure,” You whispered back, and you were.

**Author's Note:**

> Just started watching BoJack Horseman lmao Raúl is so cute in everything, I can’t


End file.
